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Mom's Gift Is a Gift You
Can Give Your Loved
Ones, Too
When Mom developed
memory problems more
than a decade ago, we
knew we were in for
difficult years ahead.
Mom transitioned through
her Alzheimer’s Disease
as many do. Changes in
her demeanor, strange
behaviors, advancing
loss of memory and
capabilities. Our
experience with her
decline was no more or
less heartbreaking than
anyone else’s. Friends
and acquaintances who
have suffered
Alzheimer’s or dementia
with their loved ones
would nod their heads,
or provide a hug,
knowing and
understanding. It’s like
a fraternity that no one
wants to join.
Mom died two weeks ago.
We grieve our loss, of
course. But we are also
relieved, and make no
excuses for our relief.
Her hell-on-earth has
come to an end.
I don’t share this with
you today to be maudlin.
In fact, just the
opposite. I share this
with you so you can
appreciate one of the
best gifts Mom ever gave
us, which became more
important than we could
have imagined during her
final days and hours.
The gift? Twenty years
ago, Mom signed a Do Not
Resuscitate order. A DNR
is an “advance
directive.” That is, a
document that states
that if she ever
suffered a life-ending
event, no extraordinary
effort should be made to
keep her alive. Mom
loved us so much that
she provided us with
peace-of-mind for her
final days and hours.
Two weeks before Mom
died, she suffered a
heart attack. Her DNR
left no questions about
what to do. True to her
wishes, she was kept
comfortable until she
passed away very
peacefully.
You can give this same
gift to your loved ones.
It’s actually fairly
simple. No matter
whether you do or don’t
want to be kept alive,
your state provides
legal documents for you
to use to designate your
end-of-life wishes. The
paperwork requires only
two other signatures. No
attorney is necessary.
And if you change your
mind later, you simply
sign new paperwork to
reflect your change of
heart.
Once the paperwork is
signed, be sure you tell
your loved ones about
your wishes, and tell
them where to find your
signed documents.
Holidays mean family
gatherings. There’s no
better time to designate
and share your
end-of-life wishes. Find
the forms and background
information you need at
http://bit.ly/advdirectives.
It’s a gift that will
cost you some thought
and some time, and will
last even beyond your
lifetime.
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© 2009 Trisha
Torrey All rights
reserved.
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